I slightly ashamed to admit it but I enjoy trash TV. The Only Way is Essex. TOWIE. However, you refer to it I like it and I'm happy to indulge in this secret pleasure viewing.Yes – it may not be very educational but it provides me with a few chuckles before the working week start.
This week I finally had a catch to up on the yearly Essexmas special and I thought we might be able to get through a whole episode without Danielle crying about the nature of her relationship with Lockie.
Alas, here we are after watching her crying as she tried to find a way to tell him she has met someone new. Oddly enough - the special featuring the rollercoaster that is Danni and Lockie (like a large majority of the other characters in TOWIE to be fair) and Danielle’s fear of not wanting to hurt Lockie's feelings has got me thinking.
Can you be real friends with your ex?
And I mean real genuine let's meet up and have a catch-up friends or real tell me how your job is going friends. Even better yet how is your love life going and do you really like them friendship levels.
I have tried probably I would say about twice to actually be friends with my exes and both times it got really messy. Mainly due to the fact that there was an undertone of something more or wanting more deep down.
I may be being bias here but I personally I don't think trying to be friends with your ex is possible. By friends I mean the kind of friendship goals examples like the ones I have mentioned above.
Even in the scenario with Danielle and Lockie you can see how confusing it is trying to be friends with your ex.
As Danielle stood there struggling to find the right words. Lockie then proceeds to say some things that he initiated to be a little spiteful and hurtful. Granted he did later apologise but it came across a little bit like a little boy pushing you off the swings and wondering why you are upset and hurt.
Sidenote: Can anyone please try and explain to me why she is always, always crying? I get being emotional (I'm a prime example if you ever needed one) but really? Like some genius once said, "Are you an onion?" Stop with all the tears. It's a bit too much.
In true TOWIE style at the climax of the Xmas special Danielle and Lockie meet outside to have a talk about the whole situation.
He says that he more upset about the lack of loyalty (I wasn't in their relationship so I can neither confirm or deny this) but I really think it’s because deep down he is sad about losing her. You know the one that got away and all that.
But I guess that is just how some choose men to express themselves when they hurt. They figuratively hit you back where it hurts.
I guess what I'm trying to say it is trying to be friends with your ex is most likely to end badly. Unless you no longer have feelings involved or have the patience and willpower of a saint. However, that is just my personal experience and opinion.
Have any of you tried to be friends with an ex? How did it work out? And if it didn't would you attempt to be friends with a future ex?
Gemma Ama x