Like I mentioned previously Sex and the City is like one of my favourite programmes of all time. Friendship, honesty and relationships, what more could you ask for?
As I am currently re-watching all 6 seasons, today’s post comes from episode 213 when Carrie asks:
"Do you have to play games to make a relationship work?"
Pretends to think (for like half a second) because I have definitely done this before! In this day and age where everyone has multiple choice and often take full advantage of it, it can be quite hard to still have traditional views on dating. You have guys who are making it plainly obvious you are just an option and then you have girls who are trying to date like guys.
I know I’ve said this a fair bit in previous posts but we all know it is true. Relationships are really not like they used to be. Nowadays you can be just ‘talking’ to someone up to a year and it just doesn’t make sense to me. If you like someone what is the hold up? I guess I just have the mindset of an old soul but the way relationships use to be when our parents were younger have changed dramatically. Yes - I’m fully aware times have changed but maybe there is something within those traditional ways we are now missing?
Before I have guys (if they even read my blog) commenting, I am not saying all men are exactly the same because that it would be silly to make such a generalised statement, but if the shoe fits and all that. Blame some of your gender for why us women think like this. Yet women have also become guilty of the having the same attitude.
Times have definitely changed. Women and men have both started taking this new approach where it seems everyone is trying to pretend they don’t actually care about the other person. I know there are times when I have definitely been guilty of this myself. I know I like the person and they know I like them but we are both playing a game of cat and mouse and before you know it someone has got hurt.
The times I’ve done this, I think the fear of being of them not feeling the same made me act out of character or just act like I didn’t really like them much, to begin with. But with modern dating when everyone is so guarded, can you blame me?
But I’m realising this isn’t the best way to handle things if I eventually want to meet 'Mr. Right'.
While I do believe you have to try to keep the person on their toes (just a little) in the early stages as it keeps things interesting. Some people literally take it way too far.
As previously mentioned in that SATC episode Carrie speaks to different people about dating and one guy said he went on a date with a woman he actually liked on a Saturday night and he didn't bother calling her until Thursday so didn't seem too eager. The woman then decided to do give him a taste of his own medicine and screen his calls until Monday. It doesn’t make sense. Why does it have to be tit for tat? I don’t understand why we have started making it more complicated than it needs to be. If you like the person tell them!
Please be aware I am talking to myself with that last sentence. It really should be that simple. Whether they feel the same is a different story altogether but I might write a future post on that.
What I am trying to say is I think we should stop playing games and tell people and just be more straightforward (again, talking to myself here). It really saves you a lot of trouble in the long run.
What games have you played when you are in relationships (or working towards a relationship with someone)? Let me know in the comment section below.
Gemma Ama x